Horseback Riding – WTF?
If you ever find yourself on Family Feud, and the topic is “things not to do if you have a back problem”, you will probably do just fine if you say “horseback riding.” Nevertheless, three days removed from the ER, we find ourselves in the lobby at 9:00am, waiting to be picked up for just that purpose. It’s a winery tour (there are some 1,200 of them around here) actually, but when looking at the options of seeing a bunch of wineries in a bus, that all start to look the same after a few “tastings”, or touring just one, but on horseback through the vineyards, the latter just seems more our style. My travel companion is understandably nervous, but adventurer that she is, wants to give it a try.
9:00 becomes 9:20, and then 9:40. By 10:00, even the concierge is getting nervous, and tracks down the tour company to find out that we have been forgotten. I’m less than thrilled to have wasted an hour sitting on the lobby (60 more minutes of sleep sounds pretty darn good right about now), but to their credit, they send a private car to pick us up and deliver us to the winery, not long after the minibus we should have been on arrived.
We are escorted quickly to our mounts, and after 90 seconds of training (that seems like all it should take to master a thousand pound animal), we elegantly climb aboard and head off.
The ride takes about 45 minutes, winding through the forest, along a riverbank, and through some fields. All the while, the snow-capped Andes loom in the distance, rounding out a idyllic setting.
As we near the winery, the real excitement begins. My seasoned travel companion, flaunting her equestrian skills is first in line behind our guide, and I am close behind. So we have no trouble hearing him point out the bees’ nest in the tree next to the trail or the path we need to stick to in order to avoid it. The less fortunate in our group are not so lucky, and in short order we hear the screams begin. Before it is all over, one of our group is tossed of her horse into the mud, and another takes off wild through the brush, frantically trying to remove her top (which is purely coincidental to my 5-star rating of this tour on Tripadvisor).
Our guide gets the group back under control and out of the woods where we can tie up the horses and assess the damage. The worst off of the lot has at least twenty stings across her arms and legs, but all things considered, we’re in pretty good shape. And as a small consolation, we’re right next to the winery, where a few tastings will help calm the nerves and numb the pain.
We get a quick tour, a lesson about the region, and then, most importantly, a few samples. Neither Angela or I have any ability to tell good wines and mediocre wines apart, but we swirl, sniff, and nod our heads knowingly when the guide takes about various flavors and aromas anyway. We even decide to pick up a few bottles for a more thorough testing back at the hotel.
With that, we are back on the horses for a final, shorter ride back to our bus. This segment passes through the vineyards, along a smooth, bee-free trail.
Having not ridden a lot of horses in my day, I’m pretty happy to have complete the circuit unscathed, and even more pleased that it has not made my cohort’s back pain any worse. Even the beat up members of our group are in better spirits and we are able to laugh (a lot) about the experience on the way back to town.